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Should You Have Children In Your Wedding Party?



Doesn’t that sweet faced little flower girl look adorable when she sprinkles rose petals down the aisle before the bride walks down it? Children in a wedding party can be a very special occurrence. If there are young children in your life, you may be considering having them be in the wedding party. But being in a wedding party can be very stressful and sometimes actually frightening for young children. It may be time to ask if you really should or should not have young children in your wedding party.

You may think that by having the children in the wedding party, they are more “there” with you than they would be otherwise. This is not necessarily the case. Many young children don’t actually notice the difference. They likely won’t remember the event, as many don’t remember lots of things from their smaller years. Sometimes being in a wedding party can be more of an issue for the adults than the young children. Consider if you are putting your feelings or the parents of the young child ahead of the young child themselves. That young child deserves that very same consideration.

Remember every young child has a distinct personality. An outgoing child will probably enjoy being in a wedding much more than a shy child. This isn’t always the case but very often is. A shy child is going to find a large crowd of adults looking at them very intimidating and unnerving. An outgoing child may enjoy their little moment in the spotlight. Then again, that outgoing child can enjoy it so much that they do something different than you expect. Remember a little flower girl can just as easily eat flower petals or pull her dress over her head as she could daintily walk down the aisle dropping flower petals. You truly have no control over what she does in that moment. Are you the type of bride who is willing to take a chance?

Having children in a wedding party is often expensive and sometimes they really don’t enjoy it. Remember that at most weddings, they are the only children in attendance so there is no one for them to play with. It is a grown up, very dressed up affair. Weddings seem very long for children. Again, having children in a wedding sometimes can be more of a concern for the families than for the children. It can at times be much kinder to the child to let them stay at home with a babysitter or to enjoy the reception with their family and other children – than to overdress them and expect them to perform.

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